Thursday, November 24, 2022

HAPPY TURKEYPOCALYPSE

Heartfelt words inside.
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Hey Friend,

Ah, Thanksgiving.

The day in which millions of gobblers buy the farm and ascend to the empyrean realm of Gobbleheim so we can gather with family and friends to clobber our hearts and pancre...i? with the stuff of Paula Deen's diabetic fever dreams, like deep-fried-cookie-dough-stuffed turkey with whipped-cream-and-pina-colada mashed potatoes, bacon-wrapped barbequed crackling rolls with Dr.-Pepper-and-whiskey dipping sauce, and cheesecake-and-caramel-filled butter balls with specklebelly goose grease drizzle.

Also the day in which we're encouraged to express our gratitude for all the things that make our nipples sing like happy grasshoppers, like bear mace, orgasms, and natural immunity.

And that's why I want to say thank you.

Yes, YOU.

Because of you, I get to do what I love most: swim in my newly-constructed Scrooge McDuck-like shekel bin help people get fitter, happier, and healthier.

And that's pretty cool. Like, "I-kinda-have-a-soul-boner-now" cool.

You're an integral part of that process because every time you spread the word about my stuff, buy something, or even just let me know how you're doing, you're contributing to the cause.

So THANK YOU.

I mean it.

I'm lucky to have you in my camp, and I'll keep doing my best to bring you more and better supplements, articles, podcasts, books, and the rest of it.

Much love from my family to yours this holiday season.

Mike

P.S. A little nervous about gaining too much fat this weekend? This article will help:

https://legionathletics.com/holiday-weight-gain/

P.P.S. If you haven't already, be sure to take advantage of my Black Friday mega-deals before it's too late.

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Legion Athletics, Inc. 1255 Cleveland St. Floor 4 Clearwater, FL 33755

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